Explosion

Every Tuesday night me and a few other guys head up to the chili's in Mesquite and have a bible study. Sometimes it's real hard for me to motivate myself to do the study for the week but I have no clue why. Every night after bible study, I go home on this spiritual high and know for sure I met with God. Sometimes I do get frustrated with the study. There's a lack of committment and we don't have a definite leader since Andy left.

So this past Tuesday night was amazing. It seems like when I declare we've had the best night ever another one comes along that blows me away. Dean led our study this past Tuesday and God revealed so much to me. We talked about the frustration of waiting for our church to explode and what its gonna take for that to happen. Kip really painted a perfect picture for me when he said, "He doesn't need our help [for the growth of our church] but He does not go to work until we give Him glory by acting in faith." What a breakthrough of a statement. When will we all begin to submit ourselves and act in faith? If we honestly long to see more people reached through our church when will we begin to let God have full control?

I left Chili's that night in a terrible state of fear. God really spoke to me and showed me where the ministry is taking me. I guess the fear came from knowing how I wasn't ready for the task at hand. In many different ways I feel ready. I feel like my talent is ready (though still needing constant improvement). I feel like I'm lining up my finances (in case God needs me full time). Everything just seems perfect except for my spiritual walk with God. There are things that I am wanting to control myself but I am realizing that I just need to give God the control. God showed me every aspect that I need to step up in my life and when He reveals that to you, its a fearful moment.

I'm praying that God reveals the same thing to me to everyone else who even plays even the smallest roll in ministry. We need to pray for these people specifically. Please pray for me and pray for those in leadership positions so that God can begin the work.